March 30, 2012


my delicious, lemony birthday cake
I'm not a huge fan of New Year's Resolutions.  Maybe I'm becoming more cynical in my mid 30's.  Perhaps I'm becoming more wise.  Let's call it wisdom.  I don't have an issue with resolutions.  I love the idea of resolving to become better: challenging myself, becoming stronger, cultivating good habits.  It's the New Year's part that I have a beef with!

Just getting through winter is a huge challenge (at least for me, in this season in life)!  In the deep, dark winter I work hard to just hold onto my self, my old self.  The last thing I need is a list of unattainable resolutions staring at me all winter long.  Guilt can be a vicious thing, especially when you aren't feeling great already.  So this year I consciously decided to not make any resolutions, of any sort, when the new year rang in.  Instead I waited.

And I'm glad I did.  It was a hard winter on me, physically and emotionally.  We all took turns getting sick, all winter long.  I slept very little.  And I felt downright awful most of the winter.  It was a doozy!

But then spring!  Glorious spring began to arrive.  Dare I say she's actually here?!  It's only the end of March but feels like the end of April.  Daffodils and crocuses are blooming everywhere.  The fragrant blossoms are intoxicating.  It is beautiful.  It is invigorating.

And with the warmer, sunnier days I am beginning to feel like myself again.  That happy, patient, creative mama that I missed these last few months, she's coming back.  It feels good.  And now I'm ready and excited to begin my resolutions.  I want to be a better person, stronger, healthier and wiser.  I am determined to be the woman I want to become.

Here are a couple of my goals that I am working on right now:

1--Exercise every morning.  Run or walk in Central Park for at least 30 min at 6am.  I am registered to run in a women's half marathon on April 15th.  And then a month later I will run the Brooklyn Half with Erica.  I'm nervous and excited.

2--Go on a sugar fast (refined sugars, that is).  The day after my birthday (and cake indulgences) I started a sugar fast.  I have done this in the past and it is great.  I am a much better person when I don't eat sugar.  I feel stronger, healthier and happier when I control avoid my incessant sugar cravings.  My goal is to do this until Oliver's birthday on June 11.  I've had a couple slip ups (usually the days I haven't slept), but I'm doing quite well.

Those are the two big ones.  I'm also working on getting to bed by 9:30pm, writing in my journal or reading every night from 9-9:30, planning and organizing meals and more city adventures.  But those two, exercise and no sugar, really help me to feel so much better.  Being a mama to three busy, wonderful kids is extremely hard work and those two tools seem to help me the most in being the mama I want to be.
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